Wolf’s To Do List (scratched in dirt with long wild nails)
1. “Fetch” onions, garlic, carrots, celery, vinegar and dill
2. “Fetch” wood
3. Boil water
4. Sniff out pigs
5. Huff and Puff
6. Snarf pork soup and pickled pigs feet
7. Lay on side and lick chops
(Note: “fetch” is in quotations because Wolf wants to be clear this is only an expression, he’s not a dog!)
If, Then Dragon
If I lived in a Fairy Tale,
I’d never get a parking ticket —
Meter Maids would turn to stone.
Arriving home, this banquet would await, stirred in cauldrons —
roses blooming on the table, grown with lilies in the moat.
My cat wouldn’t shed, mail would only be love notes,
these socks would never get wet, and I’d sing in perfect pitch.
If I lived in a Fairy Tale, every kiss would melt into "happily ever after,"
we’d never argue or leave cold spaghetti in the dish drain.
But, I live off the page — where bills pile on the desk, my nose leaks,
I drop the pie upside down and dust rolls like tumbleweeds.
Where is Cinderella? Where is my Prince?
Here is the Dragon, please take him out to pee . . .
